Ok Mamas. It’s time for a PSA. You can return to your regularly scheduled programming in a minute, but you really need to hear this. Listen closely, don’t miss it. Hear me loud and clear when I say:
You are doing better than you think.
No, for real! I’m not joking! I promise. There are sanctimommies everywhere trying to tell you otherwise, but their opinions mean nothing. Please believe me: the way you see yourself is not how those closest to you see you. That other mom who is just trying to make it through, who is just like you, she does not see you how you see yourself.
How do I know this? Because a friend straight up told me to my face, that’s how!
I was at a party where I brought a small dinner for my 16 month old. Quick back story: I found this recipe online for these super simple little spinach muffin things that even a dunce in the kitchen like me can successfully produce. They’re even easier to serve for a meal in my most busy/lazy Mom moments.
So ok, back to this dinner that I brought. It included some Dr. Praeger’s Spinach Littles, which #letsbehonest are basically spinach tater tots. Microwave for 1 minute, slap on plate. #DoneAndDone Nothing special. My friend must have thought that these were the little muffins I make and she commented something along the lines of, “You’re so good. You make all your kid’s food. I don’t do any of that.”
So a few things:
- No, I didn’t make these. They’re on the same level as chicken nuggets or any other convenience food.
- Even if these were my muffins and I did make them, making one stupidly easy food item does not equate to me making “all” my child’s food from scratch.
It blew my freaking mind that this friend thought for even one second that I was one of “those moms” when I know in my heart of hearts that is so very much not the case. And it was really eye-opening to me how often we as moms do that thing where we catch someone in a shining moment of theirs and assume that they’re 100% on top of life all the time and we’re not. (Kinda like the flip side of catching someone in one of their not-so-good moments and assuming the worst. You know what they say about assuming, my friends…)
But this whole interaction really got me thinking and I gotta tell you guys: my muffins really are awesome! Aside from being super simple, they’re pretty nutritional for my little guy and in a pinch, I feel good about feeding them to him. A rare Mom Win in this tough journey. And someone actually noticed that AND thought I was, like, Mom of the Year or something!
The cruel #momguilt irony is that in my mind, I “only” make this one thing for my kid. And I don’t feel like I’m doing “enough” cooking from scratch. But someone else thought it was enough. Someone else thought it was great, even. And that felt really good.
So sweet Mama, please take note of this special PSA and don’t you ever forget:
You are doing awesome.
You are doing enough.
You are inspiring someone.
You are KILLING. THE. MOM. GAME!
You are doing much better than you give yourself credit for. So pat yourself on the back for a job well done! I’m so proud of you!