4 Questions I Get Asked the Most as a Sober Mom

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I’m a sober mom by choice, and have never tried alcohol. I’ve never ever had a drink.

Am I religious? Nope.

Did I used to be a huge drinker and gave it up for maturity reasons? Eh eh.

Did I have a medical problem and decide against it? Negative.

I just don’t drink.

Now I’d love to tell you there is some philosophical, deep reason behind my decision to never partake in libations but the truth of the matter is, it really was never a conscious decision. The longer I went without trying alcohol, the less and less appealing it was for me and at some juncture it just became a moot point.

Keep reading for the FAQs I most commonly get from other moms about my decision to abstain from drinking.

If you’re curious about sober drinking, follow The Healing Lounge on instagram, she’s a local “bartender” serving up zero proof drinks for private parties. And they’re good. No cranberry/club sodas here, they’ve got depth of flavor and are delicious.

Sober mom FAQ #1: Do you care if I drink in front of you?

Absolutely not. We’re all adults here, by all means, have a drink, have five. Not my place to say what’s right for you. I will gladly toast with you while sipping my iced tea.

So, why if I am not judgmental toward those who DO drink are those same people judgmental toward me? Not sure. I have never been someone to care if others are drinking, even during my days at college (in Vegas!).

I get the comment, “But that must have been so challenging to not drink in Vegas,” and actually, no. I never really gave it much thought.

I was such a popular designated driver that no one seemed to care that I wasn’t joining in.

It’s more so as an adult that I feel people are giving me the ole stink eye when I don’t order a margarita out at dinner, or grab a beer at a pool party. I’ve lost friendships over it.

I believe relationships ended because of it. I even think people think I’m strange because of it. But I’m not. So let me debunk some misconceptions for you and break down my logic so I don’t have to be a closet “non- drinker” anymore.

Sober mom FAQ #2 Should I bring wine when I come to dinner at your house?

Please do. Or beer. My husband will love you for it.

Sober mom FAQ #3: Should I still invite a sober mom to a night out for drinks with other moms?

Yes! I will be so happy to not be wiping noses, faces or butts for a few hours, that I won’t mind having a cranberry juice while you have a drink. I want to hang out with my friends just like other moms! (here’s one way to start a turnkey, reoccurring  moms night if you’re looking for an easier way to coordinate seeing your mom friends).

Sober mom FAQ#4: How do you unwind at the end of the day without a drink?

I am the first to understand why moms need a drink, but I do have other vices.

Ben and Jerry’s ice creams anyone?

Or cookie dough oreos topped with marshmallow fluff?

Trust me, you are probably downing less calories than me, and not feeling as guilty afterwards. Oh, and watching the Bachelor. That helps too!

So seriously, don’t shy away from me because I don’t drink. I’m pretty cool still, I promise, and I am so loud and goofy most of the time that you won’t even notice I’m sober.

If you liked this piece, you may also be interested in reading Greta Brandt’s story, a mom in the local Phoenix cannabis industry.

4 COMMENTS

  1. Staci – I love your Blog! You are beautiful and refreshingly authentic and there ARE people who absolutely don’t give a flipping hoot that you don’t drink. It amazes many of us that you would actually be judged for not consuming alcohol – how strange that anyone should have to experience such silliness – seriously? Considering all of the complex issues going on in the world today? Who has time to actually care what type of beverage a friend is consuming? I know this is only my opinion but those individuals must have some sort of subconscious internal struggle that they are dealing with. Many of us love your wit, humor, direct and positive approach to life and there are some very fortunate mothers who have had the great opportunity to see you in action – you are a vibrant, loving, supportive, very involved, intelligent woman and a fantastic Mother! Who by the way doesn’t drink alcohol – sounds like a perfect “cocktail” for success. XO. Esther

  2. Staci – I love your Blog! You are beautiful and refreshingly authentic and there ARE people who absolutely don’t give a flipping hoot that you don’t drink. It amazes many of us that you would actually be judged for not consuming alcohol – how strange that anyone should have to experience such silliness – seriously? Considering all of the complex issues going on in the world today? Who really cares what type of beverage a friend is consuming or not consuming. This is only my opinion but those individuals must have some sort of internal struggles they are dealing with. There are many very fortunate mothers who have had the great opportunity to see you in action – we love your wit and fantastic sense of humor, your direct and upbeat approach to life! You are a vibrant, loving, intelligent, supportive, very involved, fantastic Mother and human being! Who (by the way) just happens to not drink alcohol – sounds like a perfect “cocktail” for success. Cheers and Salude to you and all of the other amazing mommies out there! XO. Esther (Bella’s Mom from USA Youth Fitness Gymnastics) – we miss you and your precious Garrett!

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